At this point, it is more than a 'bad day'.

[OldBaldy1701E]

19. I am going to the county next week.

The link you put in. I had already decided that I might try asking them about this situation. Now I just have to gather the courage to go there. (Which is another issue.) On a day when I can use the car, since I am not the employed one and that gets the priority. I do not have any expectations about it. I have plenty of misgivings.

With respect, I have tried other options. I have not been sitting here for eight years. I am just not compatible with these people. I suppose it is because I have so little in common with them. Especially with people my own age. As to fighting... well, I am a gay entertainer who was born and raised in a very tiny, rural, southern town. I have been fighting my entire life. I am tired of it. I have nothing left to give in this fight. There is nothing left to suck up. There is only pain and being hollow inside. That is what has to be addressed first. Which is why it will never be, thanks to for-profit medicine.

To be honest, I don't think the issue is whether or not I want to be helped. I think it is more that no one seems to understand the help I need. Either that, or it is just another example of how capitalism has destroyed society in the name of greed, since these days making money is more important than helping people.