Second Update

[OldBaldy1701E]

4. But that is the point.

There is no 'pulling through'. There is only a struggle to maintain the horror level where one is. I will never 'get better'. The pain I suffer will never go away. (I might be able to control it better if I could have some proper pain medication. But, I am a medical cannabis patient. Because it has proven itself to be the only thing that addresses many of my issues with one substance. The pharmaceutical industry hates it. So, they want to say I can't keep getting pain meds unless I stop taking it. And, I am tired of the pain clinics balking about it. The pain meds can help my pain, but they also make me feel sick to my stomach. However if I have cannabis as well, that all goes away and I can even function while on the meds. But they do not care.

I will close this out now. As things stand, the vehicle should be fixed and my husband can keep on working for the evil corporation that screwed him over so that we can barely survive. (We are on SNAP and state insurance. There is no further to fall except out of existence.) He is so much better of a man than I am because I would rather starve than work for someone who had done to me what Panera did to him. Anyway, thank you to everyone who felt they should speak up. I am still not sure about whether or not I am going to solve the problem of this failed life, but I guess I should try to think about it some more.