Argument over Doritos leads to man getting arrested. (I think you know where)

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Ah, Florida;

SEPTEMBER 10--A Florida man is jailed on a felony charge after allegedly battering his live-in girlfriend during a 4 AM argument “about eating Doritos,” police report.

Matthew Coppenbarger, 26, was arrested early yesterday following a confrontation with Paula Griffiths in the couple’s Clearwater apartment.

According to police, Coppenbarger “physically threw” Griffiths “out of their apt. causing minor bruising and red marks to the victim’s arm.” Officer David Bruneau added that the pair’s argument was “over and about eating Doritos.”

While the officer did not further describe the Doritos dispute, it likely involved one party consuming the tortilla chips to the consternation of their significant other.