My wife dressed up as a police officer in bedroom last night

[Duncanpup]

She was going to arrest me for being a bad boy in bed yet charges were dropped due to lack of evidence.

[Tetrachloride]

1. So... no night stick

[lostinhere]

2. Maybe no night stick, but...

definitely some night shtick...

I'll see myself out

[Duncanpup]

3. No please stay

[2naSalit]

4. yikes.

[IronLionZion]

5. Neither armed nor dangerous nor able to shoot a shot

so she patted you on the head and called you a good puppy

[Duncanpup]

6. And then rubbed my belly

[ggma]

14. Belly rubs

are the best, day or night!

ggma

[70sEraVet]

7. A friend of my wife's told her that she had seen me out with another woman the day before.

My wife said, " Oh thank God!. I thought he'd gone fishing again!"

[niyad]

8. you nearly owed me a keyboard.

[Duncanpup]

9. Awesome

[Ohiya]

10. So, you got off without having to do hard time.

[ggma]

15. Wicked!

ggma

[Ptah]

11. Assault with a dead weapon?

[Marcuse]

12. The evidence submitted by the prosecution could not stand up in court.

[AllaN01Bear]

13. The hundred and forty-second fastest gun in the West.?

https://www.cancioneros.com/lyrics/song/2613472/the-ballad-of-irving-dr-demento

[Emile]

16. Sounds like a missed deweiner!

[KS Toronado]

17. You win this round