Do you feel safe and validated (on the whole) on DU? If not, how can we help?

[scipan]

I just realized that someone who posted here a lot has not posted recently and I'm worried about them. It appears they had trouble with other posters not understanding.

It makes me very sad. I would like to do something about it.

[LearnedHand]

1. I'm an ally, and I think there are reasons members of DU's LGBT community might not be in the best place

One gay member posted in another thread recently about feeling unheard because of the conversation around trans rights (especially as framed around participation in school sports). Their pain and confusion was very visible.

[scipan]

2. It has to be scary for trans people. it's like the right is trying to erase their existence.

ETA: that's why it's so tragic if DU is failing them as well.

Thanks for responding. Trying to learn what I can here.

[LoisB]

3. I think I know who you are talking about. No posts in at least 3 months. I hope she is well

and knows there are many allies here.

[scipan]

4. I do too.

ETA: DU can be tough sometimes. What is not, and can't be, in the rules is that maybe we need to be more proactive. Like sticking up for people. I'm really not sure.

[ShazzieB]

6. I agree with being more proactive in sticking up for people.

I'm not sure there's a good way to put that into the rules, but I'd love to see more of that kind of thing here.

I'm sad to hear that there's still a problem here with people being made to feel less than safe here. I know our founders have tried to address this in the past, by clarifying certain things in the TOS, but it sounds like more may need to be done.

I don't know who the person is that the OP is referring to, but I hope they're okay and that there's a way to make them and others like them feel more welcome here.

[Keepthesoulalive]

5. I think I know who you are talking about

I learned a great deal from her and many here were not supportive. Some folks are closeted conservatives and it was as if I was in a thread about the Middle East people were so vicious in responding to her concerns. I wish her well wherever she is.

[ShazzieB]

7. Oh, those threads about the Middle East are the worst!

I assume you're talking about the ones about Israel and Gaza. Those do get vicious, so much so that I have been avoiding them for a while now. There are people on both sides who are absolutely adamant about their stance and refuse to even consider differing viewpoints, and the rhetoric can get very heated as a result.

I got involved in some of those discussions after the initial attack in October 2023, but as time went on, it became harder and harder to participate unless one was willing to take a hard line position on one side or the other. I'm sorry, but if I can't criticize any of Netanyahu's actions without being labeled an antisemite, there's no way we can have a constructive conversation, you know? As a result, I've been avoiding those threads for some time (with a few very small exceptions).

I'm really sorry to hear that someone was badly hurt by what was posted in one of those threads, but having seen having seen what those threads can be like, I am, sadly, not really surprised. I hope she doesn't let it scare her away from DU forever. There are lots of very kind and non judgmental people here, and I hate to see anyone be made to feel unwelcome by the intolerance of a particular group